“You’re dealing with a complicated psychological state.  No man in battle is really sane. The mindset of a soldier on the battle field is a highly disturbed mind and the epidemic of insanity which affects everyone there, and those not afflicted by it die very young.”

– William Manchester

American Author, Historian and Professor, WWII Marine Veteran, Purple Heart recipient, awarded the National Humanities Medal by Pres. George W. Bush and recipient of the Abraham Lincoln Literary Award

I had never really thought about taking a life. In my 20 years of responding to emergency calls as a paramedic I never killed anyone. Since then, I’ve met many police offers and war vets who have had to take a life in the line of duty, and I’m humbled that they’ve shared their thoughts with me about a topic that’s only discussed among the few who’ve been there and understand.

I was offered a new position as a paramedic on a SWAT team in 1984 because my ability to save lives was being noticed. My police administrator said I would have to attend the Police Academy first.  The paramedic SWAT position was a hybrid position with the goal of saving the life of an officer who had been shot. With police training, I could walk into the hot zone with my advanced life support equipment. I’d be armed with an MP5 with a suppressor and a Sig Sauer p226 9mm 15-shot, one in the chamber, wearing a Kevlar second-chance vest with a center mass ballistics plate. I had to learn to shoot to kill. I spent many hours at the gun range honing my skills to be ready for violent force encounters.

Thou Shall Not Kill

I was raised Catholic with the commandment “thou shalt not kill” burned into my prefrontal cortex. I even remember how fucking hypocritical it was when Cardinal Cook was on the flight pad of an aircraft carrier blessing the pilots before they left to drop napalm on the Vietnamese. Even as a kid I was thinking, “This isn’t fucking right.” Later, my research into hunter-gatherers showed me that we are not hardwired to kill our fellow man. Humans desire to work within their tribe, sharing their unique skill sets for the good of the village.

The military had years of research on how to get an 18-year-old to shut off the God switch and pull the trigger. Dehumanizing their enemy was the first step, erasing any thought that the enemy could consist of people just like us—with families and loved ones.

The True Cost to Society

The reason I’m writing this is that even today, no medical professional as of yet understands the physical and psychological costs of learning to kill in war and society.

My ten years on the job, I witnessed firsthand the metabolic damage of physical, mental and emotional stress, the addiction to alcohol, drugs and risky behavior that took over my life and the life of my co-workers. When two of my close friends committed suicide, I was forced to confront my reality. How did I miss this? They both were talking to me the day before they committed suicide and they seemed healthy, fit and focused. This was one of the most profound lessons I’ve learned during my time on Earth:  nothing is what it seems.

Hope for PTSD and TBI

These days, with advanced FMRI imaging and clinical research we can offer advanced treatment protocols for war vets and emergency service personnel in addition to cognitive behavioral therapy. This combination, along with testing the intestinal tract, i.e. the “second brain,” will shift the paradigm of treatment away from anti-depressants and sleeping pills. Now we can target the metabolic pathways and focus on beginning new behaviors. Increasing new brain cells (neurogenesis) is accomplished by elevating levels BDNF (brain derived neurotropic factor) i.e., “miracle grow” for the brain.

This treatment can also be a first-line defense for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and traumatic brain injury (TBI).  We feel with a few new platforms and distribution channels this treatment can go viral and speed this new evidence-based research into the hands of physicians and military hospital rehab centers.

That’s where you guys fit in.

Thanks for reading.

Russ

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